“Not everything is for or about you.”
I forget where I was the first time I read this. I also forget who wrote it. But the words have stuck with me for years. Not everything is for or about you. Not every thing, is for or about you.
Not every game is for or about you.
Unless a game has immense technical issues or is going out of its way to do heinous shit towards marginalized people in its world, I wouldn’t really say that I believe in the concept of “bad video games.” Hopefully I’ve done a good job of expressing that in my reviews and first impressions. If a story falls flat for me, it might not do so for someone else. If I can’t resonate with certain characters, that doesn’t mean they won’t be resonant for others. There are things I absolutely love about Destiny 2, for example, and they sit right next to the things I absolutely hate.
Not every game has to be for or about me. There are some stories, some experiences, that were meant specifically to benefit those who created them. A truth well-spoken, or a moment in time exorcised and set free. The thing nobody wants you to know is: playing video games is as subjective an experience as writing about them. Or making them.
When I played Missed Messages, a beautiful short (and free!) visual novel by Angela He, I realized that it wasn’t for me about halfway through my first (minutes-long) run. When I realized what was happening in the game, I wanted so badly to stop taking the path my character was taking. I won’t spoil it for anybody, but the end result made me and my character feel terrible. The worst part was, the game gave me a second chance. And I took it.
I don’t know the circumstances in Angela He’s life that caused her to write and illustrate Hidden Messages. It’s truly a moving and visually stunning game. But it was not one I should have played when I played it. Video game writers don’t always have the chance to choose what they write about or play, but as the only writer around here, I did. And unlike the protagonist in Hidden Messages, I can’t undo the past after the damage has been done.
I know this is making the game sound like it’s got some really wild shit that goes down. Nah. In reality, it’s a very relaxing game, aesthetically and even tonally. The subject matter is rough, to be frank, but my shit about it is some psychological hangup shit that I have to learn how to deal with on my own. It isn’t Angela He’s responsibility to help me navigate that; it’s not her game’s responsibility, either. Some games aren’t meant for you, or me, and that’s okay. I’m glad the game exists all the same.
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